A Crazy Discount Appliance Tale...

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Believe it or Not,  it really Happened.

So the other day I find a Laundry Washer at the Gigantic store,  return item marked - down for Cheap.

I tell the local staff,  "That's a pretty good price,  but I can only afford $xx.00 and how about that ??"

So they say "OK,  pay us and come pick it up soon."  So they run my credit card,  and are supposed to do their Magick within the store computer system.

I show up eventually,  and produce the receipt.  The nice store workers take that and say "It might take a little while".  Meanwhile I ramble over to the plumbing sections and walk Hüsky around the store.  He likes it there.  He sniffs the Lumber.

So I get back to 'Customer Service'  counter and the nice Store Employee has my Washing Machine for me to take away,  except something is a bit Funny...

So now,  this is a couple days after I paid for the thing and did the Deal.  Maybe there are different Staff on the clock,  in comparison to the other Day.  A large store like that has many different workers on all sorts of shifts.

I will play. What was the funny thing that happened between the different employees?

well, it's crazy, i'll give you that.

 

 

What does this have to do with Trump?

The squirrels didn't do it. 

Were mice involved?

did it play st stephen when it went onto Spin cycle?

 

i love when that happens

JamBone --

I'm told that it actually plays Music at the end of Rinse Cycle.  Definitely I'll report back on that topic.  Initial testing happens today.

But there I am in the Big Store,  and they are really making me wait a looonnng time.  So I say,  "I will stroll over to the Lumber section,  and be back in a few minutes."  Hüsky sniffs the Lumber,  we return.  Then the Nice Lady says  "OK, here's your appliance smiley"

Except,  it is a Brand-New washer in factory packaging...

So the larcenous side of me said  "Draw a funny picture of a bespectacled stout fellow in a Lab coat with A) Bugs;  B) Farm Animals;  C) Labrador Retriever..."

No wait, that's the Larsonous side,  The Far Side.

far-side-cat-fud_0.jpg

fascinating!

Can't imagine why Disco Stu would post something so engrossing at 3:30 in the morning.  Did your dog's poop shute get worn out?

Thank you for your interest in Hüsky's  assal health.  From my observation,  his 'poop shute'  is functioning normally.  He went out and had his usual morning dump this AM.  He has been eating grain-free kibble with some grain-free canned food,  with some uncooked Lamb bones and rare Turkey.

This diet tends to produce solid dog poops that don't stink much.  Even when he stole a Steak or Bacon-Pack,  his digestive system was not adversely affected.  I am very happy with his 'regularity'  and good health.  When he goes to Dog Park and takes a dump,  I have to remove the waste material and place it in the convenient trash cans.  

I think it's Great that he usually picks a spot near the plastic-bag dispenser.  A bonus if he poops on the gravel,  rather than the grass.

 

i think you could train him to jump in trash can and crap there....with a lil practice

 

keep us posted, DS

So Stu, did you tell them it wasn't the one you'd bought? That it was new and the one you'd bought had been returned?

catfud2.jpg

This one is a more 3D - esque version of the appliances.  It's a clip from the Zapruder footage.

Glad you're so proud to be a scumbag thief. Pat yourself on the back

Oh Holier than thou Hounder - 

I built my first house when I was 18 and I was on a very tight budget.

I went to a Builders Square (that was the big box store in the early 80's) and I had to get all the fixtures for my house. I loaded up on light fixtures and I was looking at the bid sales display of Hunter ceiling fans. There was a big discount on them for the week, so I counting out my cash. (no credit cards for me then) and I had just enough to get 4 fans for my house.

I loaded everything on my cart and was about to push it to the check out when some old guy who works there asked if I needed a hand putting my items in my vehicle. I thought about it for a bit and said sure. The guy wheeled everything out and put into my truck and off I went.

I know technically it was stealing but fuck he offered and I was only 18.

I gotta admit. I don't know what the punchline is. You get a discounted washing machine. You pick it up a couple days later. It's a place where you can bring your animal (or he's a service dog). 

So...what am I missing?

I believe you may have missed the part where he actually received a brand new washing machine over the scratch and dent, which he paid for. In a nutshell, he scammed the store. That's a karma thing, imo.

Some people here tend to make judgments without really knowing the whole story.   'Scumbag thief'  sounds a bit harsh.

What actually happened is the store employee brought out the appropriate machine,  same model # wrapped in packaging material.  We both looked at the receipt and confirmed that the model # on receipt and machine label matched.

My first thought was "they wrapped it up for me,  How nice of them."  So I said "Thanks !!  However,  the one I purchased had no packing material.  It seems like you went through a lot of work to wrap it up. "

Then the store employee said  "You mean that you actually purchased a Clearance item ?? "

So we got all of that straightened out.

I suppose that they would have figured out the error in a few weeks,  and said "Just hold on to it".  

But I brought home the original 'pre-owned'  appliance and hooked it up for a test-run.

This is the kind of stuff that inspired to Bruce Springsteen to write Nebraska. Brilliant.

Anyway,  to clarify,  I'm not thrilled with the appliance.  Whatever caused the initial return still haunts the Washer.  

The thing is too darn modern.  It goes through all sorts of Crazy gyrations and locks the lid (oh wait,  I forgot that shirt).

It does actually play little tunes to commemorate various cycles,  but being a Samsung,  they are not my sort of tunes.

So it goes back to the store.  The old mid-90's Whirlpool still functions.

And by the way,  I'm already going to Heck.  I've been late on X-Mas cards many times.  If I'm going to a less cushy neighbourhood of Heck for thievery,  it has to be a really Choice Heist.  Holding out for a fortified Island w/  Seaplane, Yacht,  and Submarine.

terrible story stu

1 of your worst...get some rest

would you buy a used sub from this man???

top 3 worst thread starters ever.

 Now, if you said you wanted to put a Zoner in the washing machine, and made it really, really personal, it would be a much more acceptable thread.

”I picked up a scratch and dent washer. I hate the thing, but I want to stuff that piece of shit BrianK in there and put it on the ‘sterilize’ cycle. He’s a stinky piece of crap, so it would work out perfectly.”

After all this time, Stu, you still haven’t figured out how to play for the crowd.

My God STU - How Much Crap Do You Buy ?

 

top 3 worst thread starters ever.<<<<

 

This ^^