home/sweet blog !

in 2017 i went crazy. after the election and not caring for my mental health on top of that, ended up having my kids move with their father in July after a scary emotional break. decided i was so useless to them that moving to maine seemed like a good idea

the moment we got there it was an agony of regret, and my goal was to get my crazy under control. after 2 years and finding the right meds for me: it became our mission to get back

the plus to all this is my girly, who has her own journey with her mental health, has, with great support and excellent therapy, been able to become closer to me than ever, and getting back has been the final piece to cement our relationship in a healthy and loving way that means everything to me. we are fully open and mutually supportive, grateful, and are LOVING spending all the time we can together now. even talking on the phone feels so different now that i am back. having left them at all to me now is unfathomable.

my scorpio boy is a tougher nut to crack, lol, and even he has come around to beginning to understand what happened in that truly horrific time 5 (holy fuck) years ago now. he knows how much i love him which is all i can do

annnnnyyyyyhoo, 

such a long story shortened as much as possible...last summer my daughter came to visit during the local renaissance faire where i was vending tarot. the night before it opened, she picked up one of my decks and declared it her own (!) which was fine with mama because of course it thrills me to see her become interested in my passions. she even loves the dead now...although she prefers the studio stuff. do'h lolololol

fast forward next day after i return from a pee break to our tent, she has a line of half a dozen folks wanting readings from her!!! proud momma moment x a million for me, and she then became my best pimp evah, saying: if you like my readings my mom is the real pro!

i then encouraged her to keep doing her thing and put herself out a tip jar because she deserved it ! such a natural; she reads by intuition in a way i never have. love her so much beyond words omg

anyway, day 2 we are visited by 3 women, one of which had an episode i have never experienced, where she became entranced and told me all kinds of things...my father and maternal grandmother are with me. i knew not of the latter, and was so surprised because in my lifetime she was frightening and harsh. the Fate, as we named them, said she is gentle now. she also told me a bunch of other stuff that was wild, including the fact the home purchase would "take longer"

and that it did! we made our plan, kinda, the best we manage to, haha, and we left maine on the 11th of december, with airbnb reservations through the year.

and then, used another airbnb for 6 weeks which ain't cheap...then, we ended up at a days inn which was perfectly seedy for us and our pets (;

after not one, but two delays

FINALLY our closing date on our sweet new old house was ST PATRICKS DAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

we have gone thru so much, offered and lost, bid and got approved, only to have one bought out from under us as higher cash offer, had an offer accepted and rejected them for the illusion of something "better" and ended up with the one we thought we didn't want after discovering the so called better thing was just a shiny piece of shit. OY !

here we now, home for real

i love this place so much now and we have just been here over half a week (!!!)

home was built in 1890, and, at the closing, the prior owner told us the house was moved across the river OVER THE ICE in the early 20th century...he will be sharing pics soon hopefully

it is so adorably charming with 2 acres of farm for Alex (starting his dream orchard!) with enough space for me to hold weddings in the future if i want

there is space for a small zoner jam, even, although dave and gloria def win for best property around lolol

oh! and it comes with a built in catio (: (: (: 

our 3 cat fam added a polydactyl dilute tortie in mid november off the gritty city streets of philly, and they are all LOVING the place as much as the 2 leggers

sweetest. blog. EVAH !