Dad passed Monday night.....
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92 and it was time, he had been suffering a lot over the last week. Feeling very peaceful about it, we had finally gotten close over the past three years and I had the chance to express my appreciation and gratitude for all that he had done to make my life what it is today.
The man loved his big band music...RIP dad
https://www.legacy.com/obituaries/delawareonline/obituary.aspx?n=ben-wat...
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Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Def. High
RIP Thom's Dad.
RIP Thom's Dad.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Is forgiveness possible?
I am sorry for your loss,
I am sorry for your loss, Thom. May you find peace.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: .............
Sorry for your loss
Sorry for your loss, Thom
((RIP))
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Sun so hot, clouds so low
So sorry to hear.
So sorry to hear.
Peace and good memories.
Amen to gratitude for parents.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: jonaspond
Sorry to hear about that Thom
Sorry to hear about that Thom. 92 is a great run.
Peace to all family and friends.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Strangha
Sorry to hear, Thom.
Sorry to hear, Thom.
I went through that last year and, like your Dad, it was time. There's some comfort in that.
Glad you grew closer before his passing on. Looks like he had a great and active life.
Condolences to the family.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: James Botluk
Very sorry to hear, Thom.
Very sorry to hear, Thom. Our deepest sympathies.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: ...
Sorry Thom, my condolences to
Sorry Thom, my condolences to you and your family.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: skyjunk
Peace and prayers for your
Peace and prayers for your Family Thom
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Tim
Sorry for your loss.
Sorry for your loss.
Death don't have no mercy
RIP Pops
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: cb
My condolences Thom
My condolences Thom
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: gypsy tailwind
Sorry for your loss Thom.
Sorry for your loss Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Chuck511
Sorry for your loss Thom. My
Sorry for your loss Thom. My condolences.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: jazfish
So sorry,Thom. Condolences
So sorry,Thom. Condolences
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: That’s Nancy with the laughin’ face
RIP Thom’s Dad
RIP Thom’s Dad
sorry for your loss
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: 19.5 Degrees
My condolences to you and
My condolences to you and your family, Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: New & Improved
Sorry for your loss, Thom.
Sorry for your loss, Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: The Eggman
Sorry for your loss, Thom.
Sorry for your loss, Thom. Condolences to you and your family.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: MeditateontheQ
Sorry for your loss, Thom.
Sorry for your loss, Thom. You are in our thoughts today.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: An organ grinder’s tune
sorry for your loss Thom.
sorry for your loss Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Ausonius
Many thanks for all of the
Many thanks for all of the nice thoughts, truly appreciated.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: free bird
my condolences, Thom, sorry
my condolences, Thom, sorry for your loss
(RIP, dad)
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: makaha
sorry for your loss, thom –
sorry for your loss, thom – love to you and family.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Denny
Sorry for your loss, my dad
Sorry for your loss, my dad rocked out to big band music too
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Philzone Refugee
Peace to you and your family,
Peace to you and your family, Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Mr. Sunshine State
Hey Thom,
Hey Thom,
92 is a helluva run. My father would've been around that age, and was a "crooner/big band" guy, also, (golf junkie, too).
Sincere condolences.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: _
Sorry for your loss. Glad to
Sorry for your loss. Glad to hear you are in a good head space.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Johnny D
Thom, It's heart-warming to
Thom, It's heart-warming to read that you were able to more fully connect with your father over the last few years.
Thank you for sharing his story - and what a story his is.
Best to you and your family,
John
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Druba
I'm glad your dad made it to
I'm glad your dad made it to the ripe old age of 92, pretty amazing when we think about it! Wishing you and your family the very best, and hope you find the strength to get beyond the shock that ensues.
(my dad passed 2 months ago at 91, but didn't have a will, so the state of NC is in charge, I hope you don't have to deal with anything like that, ugh!)
Peace!
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: ParadiseWaits
Sorry for your loss, but glad
Sorry for your loss, but glad you were able to make up for lost time in the last few years. Peaceful passage to Thom's Papa.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Sycamore Slough
Condolences to you and
Condolences to you and surviving Family.
When my Dad was heading out, his senility made it difficult to communicate much. However, lucid times made for some good conversations.
i'm happy for you that there was a good flow of communication.
RIP Thom Dad.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Fly
Bof Of Rain Tom. 92 is good
Bof Of Rain Tom. 92 is good. Peace to you and Ben and the rest.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: MarkD
Sorry for your loss, Thom.
Sorry for your loss, Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: |-|/-\|_|_
Condolences, Thom.
Condolences, Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Sound and Vision
Thom, condolences to you and
Thom, condolences to you and your family.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: DNB - Best band & fans in the land!
my deepest condolences Thom
my deepest condolences Thom
I don't think about it much because we live on opposite coasts, but my dad is 93 (mom is 88) and it won't be too many more years before I'll be facing their loss... wondering what I should be doing, if anything, to prepare for that eventuality... I try to make the most of my twice-yearly visits to visit family in central New York State... holding on to positive memories of the best times we shared together
love will see you through
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: I rang a silent bell
Sorry for your loss Thom.
Sorry for your loss Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Ausonius
GaryFish, my advice to anyone
GaryFish, my advice to anyone that is anticipating the loss of a loved one is to make sure that you have done whatever is necessary to heal any wounds or clear up any trouble in the relationship while you have the chance to do so. I was never very close to my father, by his own admission he was a man of few words and didn't know how to be open emotionally. He was a strict disciplinarian and I was raised at a time when it was not uncommon to use a belt for punishment. This caused a lot of problems between us, I remember being scared to go ask him if I could use the car when I was a teenager.
But when he became incapacitated a little over three years ago I was glad that I was here (along with my older brother) for him. I think he was amazed that I spent so much time looking after him, at one point about two years ago he said "I never knew you were such a nice guy." As he started to decline and required more patience I had family members who visited mention how well they thought I dealt with him, and we created a very strong bond. The man who I can never recall saying "I love you" for the vast majority of my life said it every time I saw him for the past two years. They were the last coherent words he said to me about a week ago.
When my mother passed ten years ago I regretted not telling her how much all she did for me meant to me, how everything that I have in life now is a result of the sacrifices and effort that they put into giving me opportunities. I wanted to make sure that I didn't make this mistake with my dad so about a year ago we had that talk. I can't tell you how this has helped me with his passing, to know that there's nothing more that needed to be said, that despite the mistakes we both made we had forgiven each other completely and loved each other for what we are.
Thank you Zoners. This represents the best of what we have to offer.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Pipe Slingin'
My condolences, thom. Please
My condolences, Thom. Please know that you and yours are in my prayers.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: hooper
Sorry to read this......RIP.
Sorry to read this......RIP.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: long live the dead
Thom
Thom
grateful and connected forever
I know the drill. Dad passed at 101 1/2 last month and it was in fact awesome
I played a lot of Duke Ellington for him towards the end
And music and art and Orchids were a huge part along with 1 million other interests
Peace and a quiet joy to all
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: treat island
Dear Thom, and the rest of
Dear Thom, and the rest of you whose parent has died "recently", it's quite sweet and wonderful that we give ourselves to the love and care of our aging/ailing/dying parents. Loving them, sharing ourselves with them and taking what they have to give, it gives so much meaning to life.
My dad died at 95 a couple of months ago, in no way lucid, but there was still a connection. In some ways it was like when Greg died, the mysterious brain doing what it can with what little's left - connection and love.
Wishing all of you ease as time goes by.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Bluelight
Very sorry to read this Thom.
Very sorry to read this Thom.
Rest In Peace +
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: dj_easy_wind
So sorry for your loss, Thom
So sorry for your loss, Thom.May your Pop Rest In Peace...
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Mylar
Condolences to you and your
Condolences to you and your family, Thom. Wishing you peace and strength.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: felina
>>>we had finally gotten
>>>we had finally gotten close over the past three years and I had the chance to express my appreciation and gratitude for all that he had done to make my life what it is today.
That's awesome Thom--it really is.
Good on both of you.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: TommyGutt
Hang in there Thom, lost my
Hang in there Thom, lost my dad a few years back,it was tough,cause I'm living in France, I flew in, missed my connecting flight,and arrived at the very end of the funeral, My mom had no idea I was flying back.it was basicaly ,my mom, the priest,and my sister,who were left..I stayed thurs,Fri,Sat,Sunday..snuck my Mom into the Vibes ,the Nevilles were playing,awesome show.mom and I cried, kinda a gospel show, felt my Dad lookin down, he would've said "oh for heavens sake"flew back monday to work in France !,theyre in a real happy place
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Ausonius
So it's been a strange week.
So it's been a strange week. For the first two days I felt this overwhelming peace, it was really powerful and helped me get through the things that needed to be done. Focused and centered in But for the past four days I've been feeling totally unconnected to the outside world and in a mental state of complete uncertainty about just about everything. I'm assuming that this is all part of a normal progression and I'm just riding it out at this point but it sure has been strange.
Thanks for all of the positive input people.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Highnote
Sorry for your loss. Stages
Sorry for your loss. Stages of grief are different for everybody but they're real. Time heals.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: MikePA
Thom - its gonna get easier -
Thom - its gonna get easier - you may not notice it even at first but it will. You've got a lot of positive to focus on, especially your reconciliation and new found relationship with your father the last few years. Be comforted that you made the effort and your Father realized the man you turned into and told you so....
Peace
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Strangha
This has been a nice thread.
This has been a nice thread. Your dad's passing sucks, but if it was time... And it sounds like you were in tune with each other.
And as much crap that people have given you over the years for your political stances, it sure was really sweet to see everyone gather 'round and offer support when it really mattered - real life stuff.
I've experienced similar feelings with some deaths in my circle (my dad and my best friend) and I just wanted to say good luck and wish you heart strength as you adjust to the new reality.
May it lead you to some great personal discoveries that help carry you through.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Sycamore Slough
"... for the past four days I
"... for the past four days I've been feeling totally unconnected to the outside world and in a mental state of complete uncertainty about just about everything. I'm assuming that this is all part of a normal progression..."
Most people are more insane than usual for some months after their parents die. Grandparents, not as much. That's more like having a pet Goldfish pass away. Don't worry, you'll be OK.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: treat island
I've been feeling totally
If you can, give yourself the space to just be; to be uncertain, to be out of your usual life in whatever way, to just be. You're right, what feels abnormal is a normal progression. Loss and grief are often experienced in unexpected forms; let yourself go with it. I think if we don't try to "get through it" but 'work with it' there can be unexpected richness.
Sending you love and strength from afar, Thom.
Top of Page Bottom of Page PermalinkFull Name: Deadly
Love and strength to you and
Love and strength indeed to you and family, Thom.
I never did reconcile my differences with my father before he died. Glad you did!