Goofy Humble Brags

I’ll tell you what I hate about my town is the property taxes. It really puts a bit of a damper on living in an $800,000 house! 

We drove to the Walt Disney Family Museum after school yesterday and it only took 40 minutes. 

I can walk to the pizza port and the beach.

my neighborhood is literally just me, my boss, this guy greg, and some mexican guy whose name i dont know because the other two people on the mountian only refer to him as "the mexican"

I live in a small town,population of 350 people.

No crime,in 40 years I've never locked my doors , don't even have a set of keys.

The pantry is this quant low cost deli market country store run by a bunch of really cool and compassionate folks who I now love so much

Best coffee in town

Place opens at 5am.....

There's an 1100 seat theater in my building that gets nationally touring concert acts.  A short walk to trails by the lakes, the Henry Art Museum, movie theaters, and a diverse selection of ethnic cuisine.  A 15 minute walk through the UW campus to the light rail station, Husky Stadium and Hec Ed Pavilion (where the GD played the longest version of any song they ever performed in 1974, a 46 minute version of Playing In The Band).

Nice thread, Dise.   There is so much wrong with my neighborhood, but it's good to remember what's good.

Having an elotes man.

Since we are bragging about our communities, this town is ranked:

* Most breweries in any city in the world.

* Least religious large city in America.

* Best city in the world for vegans.

* No. 1 ranked airport year after year.

* Most depressed city in America.

* No. 1 city for semi-factual superlatives.

hum·ble·brag

/ˈhəmbəlbraɡ/

verb

gerund or present participle: humble-bragging

make an ostensibly modest or self-deprecating statement with the actual intention of drawing attention to something of which one is proud.

————————

brag

/braɡ/

verb

1. 

say in a boastful manner.

"“I found them,” she bragged"

synonyms:boast, crow, swagger, swank, bluster, gloat, show off; More

The birds eat half of the food in the feeder in 30 minutes....

The traffic on some days consists of horses, llamas, and one camel.  Really. Not a single car that day.

The clear cutting sucks, but the firewood is free, (well, almost...it's still work to get it!)

1. Lowest church going population per capita in the nation

2. Home to national corn dog day

3. The oldest Mosque in the Pacific NW

4. Usually ranked in the top 10 for (safety / livability / low crime) for a town it's size 

5. Squirrels Tavern

>>>>* Most depressed city in America.

Sounds like those vegans need some Bacon to cheer them up.   

I finally figured this town out; its the "po folk" that we can't even afford the other O & that R, that make it tick.

The people are the heartbeat man ~

This library is a beautiful place and my Church is a half mile away.

Find another planet or a rock to hide under, if you can't hug a poor homeless person.

My own immediate family did....later...

My mayor was acquitted.

This thread could use some pics....oh, and fall in my back yard rules.

This library is a treasure trove of history of the orignal settlers. 

Behind me are 24 large black & white historic photographs of Bohemia

Took those last week.

The first time I heard of Bohemia was in 1984 after the Dead show at Nassau.

We saw this very tall Long Island native Indian (our age,  waking in the gully of the Long Island Expressway, which is now the express lane)

He was tripping heavily and thought he could walk home 30 miles east & then 10 miles south.

Was saved him and brought him out here.

The cops are trying to chase me out of here & that line in Just Like Tom Thumb Blues that the cops don't need you and man they expect the same has relevance.

So I work here during the day but live far away.....

Supposed to be the cleanest air in the country here(when there are no fires).

Deer sleep in the vacant lots either side of me.

I am at the foot of Mt Konocti and can see for many miles in every other direction.

I can almost afford living here.

I live in a small town.

Tourist season is big around here.

We have a disease named after our town. Lyme disease, maybe you've heard of it? It's a hoot!

That looks like Madurodam in the Netherlands. Visited there when I was a kid. Will never forget it.

The only thing I feel like bragging about is I have very nice San Augustine grass in the yard.

>>>I am at the foot of Mt Konocti

wow markd! we are close. i am waaaaaaay up adobe creek road off of highland springs. the address is mendocino county but the gate at the bottom of the driveway is in lake county

I'm going to change it up, our son got 1430 SAT along with GPA 3.45, hoping it gets him into his first choice, American University, to study International Policy and work at either the U.N. or State helping those in need of food, shelter and education.

^^^^

Nice Elvis.   On a related topic, my son was on the model UN team in undergrad and is just finishing up his first semester at George Washington Law in DC.   I hear GW has a great undergrad international politics program too. 

 Ironically, GW is the also the recipient of major funding from the Saudi royal family.    My son's apartment is in Foggy Bottom right across the street from the Saudi embassy.   He says he sees Lamborghinis pulling in and out of the place and is afraid to walk by it.

DID YOU KNOW?????

The term “humblebrag” was coined by Parks and Recreation writer, stand-up-comedian and massive Phish fan Harris Wittles? He sadly died of a drug overdose but was a regular poster at the Phish “Phantasy Tour” drug-band message-board. 

He even has a wikipage and a pretty long one at that: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harris_Wittels

Ken

He (we) looked at GW, but population wise it's a bit too big for him. His school has a total enrollment 230 kids, grade 4-12

Paradise ~

Its at has been touching to see the glee on the faces of the 100's of parishioners this Sunday morning when the see that the homeless person they are keeping in their parking lot is still alive.

I know that feeling well.

When I was a kid, we found a half dozen Box Turtles crossing a country road in Maryland.

We took them back with us to Long Island to raise; and each morning, I would run down stairs to see if any of the Box Turtles were still alive, or-not...

Post Addendum ~

I  made a cameo at the 7AM XMAS Mass, that was very nice

Right in the middle of Deep Blue State Property Tax Scam territory.

Obnoxious selfish people.

I live on the last in a series of dead end streets. Folks only come down here if they live here,  are visiting someone who lives here, or they are lost. I have a canal in my backyard, a creek across the street, a bay at the end of my street,  and the ocean is about two miles from my front door. There are 6 or 7 pizza joints and 4 or 5 Chinese restaurants within a few miles of home,  and a couple aren't horrible.  My neighborhood is home to a couple NJ state troopers,  a few local police officers,  and the fire chief. Crabbing and fishing in my backyard,  i wouldn't eat any of it though.  My neighbors include ospreys, ducks, egrets,  herons,  swan and turkeys.

Some of my neighbors...

Cool.

I'm in C.L.R. Larry. We should burn one.

Oh, i also have a diner a mile from home, plus two Mexican and a Cuban restaurant around the corner.  

Then there is the land trust and county park along the bay, that's a mile from home too....

Remember, all the terrible things you heard about Jersey are true, best to stay away. 

first-world issues...

 

have fun with your conspicuous consumptions

 

There really are SO many beautiful places to live in our country, I just can’t believe I can afford to live in any one I want. 

Praise be to God.

Shouldn't the asshole who just bought the new Alfa Romeo link his thread here?

One more thing, a couple of disasters have brought national attention to my town...

Sandy...

And...

I've always found it hard to brag about a place that was stolen at the point of a gun; let alone that humans could never have had a hand in creating ... 

Did he say '"yoot"?

Mushroom fields (the good ones) as far as the eye can see 5 miles from my doorstep

I live in Santiago, Chile, which is far more urban than my ideal place to live, but it has several advantages:

I'm less than a five minute drive from my parents in one direction and my inlaws in the other.

My kids' schools is 5 minutes walking distance from the house.

My neighborhood is safe, which in a big city is a big deal. Municipal security is always around or will be in 3 minutes if I call them.

I have a (small) front yard and a (small) backyard and a little pool. Plus a dog, a cat and two land turtles. 

Kids are happy and healthy and I have tons of flowers in my yard. And yes, the house is mine. Well, the mortgage is, anyway...

Also, there's like 5 or 6 parks within a 5 block walking radius from my house.

And, I can grow whatever I want in my backyard and no one bothers me.

My Street Is Lined With Awesome Sycamore Trees

Those are my favorite.   Drop a bunch of shit but man are they beautiful. 

Just had to cut down four huge trees in my front yard as they were dying and now need to replant.   Might see if I can make one of those live down here.      

Also We Have One Of The Best Fire Departments In The Country - Ventura County Fire Department

Friggin' sycamores. For some reason, the original colonists and subsequent generations of European descended inhabitants of Santiago, Chile decided they would cover the city with (in English) Old World Sycamores. Well, they drop so much pollen that pretty much every one hates them. Plenty of native vegetation they could have gone with that use much less water, last longer and drop less pollen. Oh well, they sure are pretty....

Your place sounds very cool, Dise.

we have a pretty decent party house and have been lucky enough to have a few somewhat-known musicians (as well as an infamous zoner or two) drop by our gatherings.

From above, Our son just accepted to Adelphi on Long Island 1 of his top 3 choices

Zang - Try a Sycamore or 2 Out They are Hearty Trees = You Might Be Surprised !

I Guess Dise i see a Few But Mainly leaves and little stick branches that fall - They Are My Favorite Tree.